What are some of the things shared with both examples of betrayal? You think you really know someone. You think they are honest and that they believe in you like you believe in them. You think they are your good friends but what you don't know is that their feelings are much more contrived, often based upon what you can do for them and not as a good friend who will be honored through thick or thin. They stop valuing you, maybe in a social or organizational way or maybe in what had been a close personal relationship, and they just drop you like you are a bag of potatoes getting ready to be put into the cooking pot. Whatever the format, however, it hurts, for it tells you that you have used bad judgment in trusting and believing someone unworthy of that honor and you wonder why would someone do such a thing to you.
In my case, betrayal first came as a young boy upon the death of my father. Dad had been a successful doctor in our hometown, everyone knew and liked him in the small city, and life was good for the family. But upon his sudden death, things rapidly changed regarding some of those who had previously been my friends. When a mom becomes both mom and dad for a boy, the relationship with other families sometimes changes dramatically. You no longer have contact with those you called friends. You might be excluded from functions that your family was previously included in and all contact becomes lost after the short period of your grievance. You sadly find that those who for whatever reason no longer feel you to be useful to them and they just slip away. As bad as that seemed to me, it was nothing compared to my more recent betrayal for this one was not due to social standing, but one due to fraud. It was a criminal activity and to be treated this way by someone you trusted is hard to deal with and it takes time to weather the storm. I am most fortunate to have a loving wife and some very good friends and I will be fine and we will move forward, but just a lot more cautiously and much less trusting until that trust is proven beyond doubt. I must, however, lose sight of the good in humanity and force myself to be open and true but just in a more discerning way.
Now the first level of betrayal above was of a much lesser degree, for there was no fraud involved. It's just that in our social circles today we often pick friends not just because we like them but because of what they can do for us. But it doesn't involve illegal action, just practices that are not always the best from a good moral standard, but just common practice in a social world operating under the auspices of man and not the godly firmament. But the latter, the fraud of a type committed against me and my family, is much more serious because it involves violations of the laws of God and of man as well. So, how do I properly deal with the anger and hate that could easily infect my soul and the answer is that I must defer to the guidance given to us by my Lord and Savior. Remember, Jesus was the only perfect man to walk the face of this earth. He was sent to us to teach us and to save us from sin, and through the awful betrayals made against Him, he was tried, convicted and sentenced to death. And with His death comes the answer to what we must do in dealing with our own forms of betrayal.
We must look to Christ for the answer and replicate his actions. We must forgive those who trespass against us in what they do. That, I know is a very difficult challenge, but do it we must if we trust in God. The next step is up to the perpetrator and they must accept the offer by what they do. They must offer their true apology and offer to make things right in whatever way they can. We must forgive them if they are sincere, even if they can't make things totally repaired. At that point we have to leave things up to God for He is their judge, not us. In any regard, by giving forgiveness we free ourselves from the burden of having hatred and replacing it with peace and tranquility. We can't worry about the rest of the consequences, but leave that to God, for by our magnanimous response, He will respond to us in ways we don't fully understand but they will make us whole in ways of his planning. It's all about trust, my friends, and so I will forgive and move on with my life.
Remember, friends, replace hate with love, for love will lift you out of the mire. It is working for me and it will work for you, too. Be safe out there and God bless.